It is cold, the roads and sidewalks are icy, it is also dark - amazingly enough... so I am heading out to the gym to run on the dreadmill. I have a little less than 16 weeks before my marathon, I have got to train no matter what!
Yesterday I was 40 minutes late to work. There had been someone there for 45 minutes waiting for me. It is the entire reason for my job - and I wasn't doing it. I could have easily known this person would be there waiting for me if I had checked a website I should be checking daily by 7:30 a.m, but I didn't do that either. I was busy meeting my sponsee and working with her. I have got to get my priorities straight again. I have obviously strayed very far from what I am supposed to be doing.
I think this weekend I will take some time to really reflect on what I am doing. I have to regroup. I have been running against the clock for a long time now and it feels awful, so I do stupid crap like being late for work.
I will stop my extracurricular activities in the morning, because I need to be at work on time. I have responsibilities there, and they pay me to fulfill them. I can go to the 6:30 meeting, but I can't spend an additional hour after the meeting. I need to meet this sponsee after work or on the weekend, not before work. I need make my running fit my schedule, not the other way around.
So I am heading out to the gym. I can be done running and back home by 7 a.m., and then get ready and to work at a decent hour. I need to be a responsible adult here, not a spoiled child.
9 comments:
Don't you hate that feeling when you're late for something?
It sounds like you've got a good, workable plan of action, though!
Love the term dreadmill. I hadn't heard that one, before.
For many of us (certainly my experience) life is a series of priorities. Ocassionally they can get out of order. At least being sober helps me see when things are out of whack.
You're very busy. That works for lots of people. Still, I'd be wary of the human doing vs. human being trap. From the brief time I've followed your blog, it seems like everything you're doing really is important. Still, you may have to do some pruning. I'm not sure exactly how it applies here, but "First Things First" might fit.
Peace.
I do the same thing. I liked cracked head blog's suggestion of pruning.
I have let some things slide as well since I've been so focused on the program. I like what you have to say. It shows how responsible you are. I need to regroup on my priorities as well.
Soloutions in Sobriety.
I also think you're right to reconsider your priorities. However, the way I read your post is that you might be beating yourself up. I was talking to a friend at work yesterday who reminded me not to be too hard on myself. I pass this reminder on to you.
Yes, take a little time to reflect and regroup. And sure, you should be to work on time, yes, you should find time in your day to run, yes, you should work with your sponsee whenever YOU are free. And that's cool. But don't get down on yourself for it-- it will only pull you down lower. (Or am I reading your post wrong?)
It's so easy to be too hard on ourselves when we are striving for perfection. Don't forget that you're doing awesome things.
Don't you wish you could make a living running and going to AA?
I think you'll be able to shift things around little strawberry shortcake.
I know how you feel MC... I find myself making things more difficult when it comes to meeting obligations and being as successful as I can be at work and with my family...
There are times when I also have to stop, fetch myself up and do a little inventory... good luck!
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