Although I truly am a sober member of Alcoholics Anonymous, this gives me the creeps. I am NOT the ultimate AA member. There are thousands who are more active than I am, who have many more answers than I do. I am just a plain old garden variety alcoholic who is sober by the Grace of God. There are lots of us.
So, here it is... if you haven't been to AA... or if you have been to AA and you don't know what to do... here is the secret:
Go to meetings
Get a sponsor
Read the big book
I probably should have left out the "don't think" part because it upsets people. But they told me that when I was new and I happen to think it is very good advice. They told me "my best thinking got me here," which used to confuse me because I thought that being in AA wasn't such a bad thing. However, who ever grew up aspiring to be a member of Alcoholics Anonymous? Nothing better can happen if you are an alcoholic, but being an alcoholic isn't such a good deal.
If you read what I wrote on Friday, I did go to the Farmer's Market on Saturday and bought a bushel of chile peppers and a bushel of tomatoes, and lots of onions, garlic, and cilantro. I spent all day Saturday and Sunday standing in my kitchen making salsa. Roasting chiles until my neighbors were knocking on my door telling me the insides of THEIR houses smelled of the lovely aroma of roasting chiles. It was glorious. A lot of work, but as I told my daughter on Saturday - This is the best time of the year. I stood in my kitchen and watched football on TV, while roasting chiles, peeling tomatoes, chopping onions, dicing garlic and mixing it all together. Putting it into pint jars and canning it. It is all lined up on my kitchen counter now and it looks so darn pretty.
What's that got to do with being sober? Just about everything to me. Because I am sober, I get to do simple ordinary things that other people do. When I was drinking, I would be too sick or too drunk. Or I would start a project and couldn't ever quite finish it. Or maybe the neighbors would come over and try to compliment the lovely aromas and I would decide they were picking on me and spend the weekend feeling persecuted. Etc., Etc., Etc.
If you are visiting here and have any comments, please let me know. I really think I ought to take the blog off in its entirety, but I will hang in for a little bit on the off chance that this rambling thing is helping someone.