I thought sensitivity was an asset until I got sober, and then I realized it was a crippling liability. This morning at my 6:30 a.m. meeting, I started to share, and looked across the table at two of my friends. They were talking amoungst themselves and laughing. I finished my sentence and shut up. I talked with them after the meeting about this - about my sensitivity and also how difficult it is to talk when there are side conversations going on. I do not ever want to be the person who starts sharing in a meeting and everyone gets up to go to the bathroom or get coffee.
I went out for breakfast with my friend H., who assured me that I am a long way from being the boring person in the meeting.
I came home from work early yesterday because no one wanted my snotty presence at work. I have a cold. I feel somewhat better today and I am about to get out and try to run 8 miles. We shall see if I feel THAT good.
"We alcoholics are sensitive people. It takes some of us a long time to outgrow that serious handicap. " -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 125
13 comments:
Well, 8 miles is a lot when you're sick, but my nephew assures me that once you hit 8 miles, you get a runner's high. I wouldn't know, never having gone that distance... yet!
Hope you feel better soon, girl. And, I cannot imagine how you could ever possibly be boring!
I can take over-sensitivity to a ridiculously high level. I cannot imagine EVER getting over it; it's just part of my make-up.
Thanks for the reminder that I am not always alone.
LOL too many spelling errors and forgot a few words in my last comment.. that will teach me to not check it before I post it-HA
What I was saying, I can relate to being sensitive.
Also, my homegroup is infamous for side talk, during everyone's sharing, and NOONE is immune from others having a conversation while they share, I dont like it. It prevents me from wanting to share sometimes. I bet it prevents others too. I will bring it up at the next business meeting and see what that goes
thanks for sharing this. I love you
Have a good run
PS Bayleigh will be in Colorado - keep an eye on her for me... :)
Talking, giggling, opening soda cans, rattling cracker package paper. All those, and more, are unacceptable when someone is sharing. We need to show respect to our brothers and sisters in recovery. This stuff pushes my buttons big time. Yes, I can be overly sensitive, but I do not wear make-up like Daave does.
Thank you all. I just got home from a run that turned out to be 10 and a half miles - I meant for it to be 8... I got too far from home. It was pretty grueling. Anyway, thanks for making me laugh!
MC, there are some that are not available to hear the message. However there are those that do, and so your ESH should never be muted. We hear things at different times, and perhaps there was someone in that room that really needed to hear your message this morning.
Yes it is very rude to interupt someone when they speak, please don't let them drain you cuz there is someone out there that needs to hear what you have to say.
I wish I too, could lose a little of my sensitivity....but then again...that's probably what makes us who we are. I'm glad you said something...you probably helped them also.
I can relate. I tell myself "Thanks for sharing" and know in my heart my perceptions are just toooo screwy. I don't know if that is good or bad... to just ignore those thoughts. Sometimes I can't ignore them and share with the sponse who will straighten me out.
I have missed you tooooo. I have a timer on my desk now. Can not go for more than 30 mins without taking a break.
Happy Sunday ;)
I am quite sensitive too. It would probably bother me a lot if I were trying to share and could hear other people talking. I dunno, I think it's a respect thing, ya know, like pay attention when someone is sharing..
I cannot believe you ran 10 1/2 miles when you are sick! Either you ROCK or you're crazy LOL
love ya!
MC, I share your sensitivity sometimes moe than others, but it's there. I have been "blessed" with thin skin. I am actually glad of this, for it's what led me to make the necessary changes in my life in order to get sober. I don't do pain of any kind well. So, my bottom was not as ugly as some others who can take a lot of pain and misery.
Good luck with your 8 mile run! I hope ya get to feelin better!
peace be with you!
wow, 10, great!
When you bare your soul to others that you may not know well, it is difficult enough. When others are not focused on what you are saying then they aren't listening or learning. I remember that I called Hot Line many years ago when I was desperate. The laughter on the other end of the phone was enough to put me further into despair. I never called again.
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