I keep asking my son what he needs from "home". The only thing he has asked for is some strawberry jam - only if I have some, mind you. Well, this year I never did can anything, so I don't have any strawberry jam made. Yesterday I finally found some strawberries and made some strawberry jam for my son, and will mail it to Iraq.
I haven't heard from him for 9 days now. I am fighting that panic that I get.
My daughter is so addicted to meth and so dysfunctional. Last night I quietly let her know that I am aware she lost her job... she was pretending that she just got off work, but in reality got fired a week or two ago. I do not know what is going to happen to her or her daughters, my granddaughters.
I am praying a lot. On my knees. I know that it is all as it should be, it just doesn't feel too great right at this moment. So, I will put on my running gear and head on out to the gym to get on the treadmill. Once I hook myself up to my iPod, I tend to forget everything for 30 or 40 minutes while I run. It is a good deal. Then I will go to my job and put in an honest day of work.
"We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day 'Thy will be done.' We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions." -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 88