I wanted to say first: there is a new blogger, a young man named Kyle, who is going to his first ever meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous today. If you have a second, go over and say hello.
Yesterday, reading about an experience of blogger Steveroni, I was reminded of something that happened years ago. I was sober 6 years, and living with my new husband in northern Washington. Things got very bad between us (dangerously bad), and I left our home. I had nowhere to go, so I drove to a nearby town and got a motel room. I sat on the bed. It seriously occurred to me that I had two choices: drinking or suicide. At that point, those honestly seemed like my only options.
I knew that I did not want to drink. I had no question about that. And although I was desperately unhappy because of my heartbreaking marriage, I didn't really want to die. But what was I to do in a motel room in Mount Vernon, Washington?
Thanks to six years of sober experience, I picked up the phone. I didn't call my sponsor. For some reason, I called a woman in AA who I was not particularly close to. I think calling her was one of those intuitive thoughts that come to us. She answered her phone. I said "Hi Jeri." Without hesitation or any other small talk, she said "where are you?" I told her. She didn't ask any more questions, she just said, "I will be right there."
No kidding. She didn't need me to tell her anything. She knew I was in trouble and without a second's hesitation, she drove over to help me. She did help me. We went and ate - I hadn't eaten in a while. She listened to me. She showed her care and concern for me, and that was a revelation to me.
Of course, I did end up going back to my husband and things got much worse for a couple more years. But I will never forget how Jeri came to that motel room and likely saved my life. I was in serious trouble.
I hope that I have been able to express my gratitude forward. I hope that I have been able to be the kind of person who answers the phone and hops in the car. I know that sometimes I haven't wanted to be. Sometimes I would just like to not always be "on call." But we really need to never quit being on call for another brother or sister alcoholic. I owe my very life to Jeri and others just like her.
"I once knew a woman who was crying before a meeting. She was approached by a five-year-old girl who told her, 'you don't have to cry here. This is a good place. They took my daddy and they made him better.' That is exactly what AA did for me; it took me and made me better. For that I am eternally grateful." -- Alcoholics Anonymous (4th ed.), p. 431