Why I blog

Thanks Findon for this award. It is good because it has made me think. Why do I blog? I have asked myself this question on almost a daily basis for about a year now. Or maybe longer.

I started this blog as a way to have a conversation with another blogger who was driving me crazy on my other blog - and I realized he was an AA member. I didn't want to violate the 11th tradition on my other blog - it had my full name and a photo of me. So I started this blog. I called it "Anonymous Alcoholic," which it remained until a year or so ago when someone else came along and called himself that. He wasn't going to yield the name - so I did. And poof! then, like most bloggers, he was gone.

The beginning of my blogging career was wonderful. I was in love with these folks who came by every day and visited and commented. We were like a herd, moving from blog to blog. There was basically one group of recovery bloggers. We all read each other. We all "knew" each other. There weren't all these people coming and going all the time. We all actually READ each other's blogs. And we had "half nAAked thursday" each week, where we posted a photo. It was intended to be a photo of a body part, photographed in some creative way. Oh, they were creative. They were wonderful. How I looked forward to this each week. But then, that too, got taken over by people "we" didn't even know... posting pictures of their dogs. oh joy.... read the sarcasm here. Eventually, we stopped posting, and now those blogs don't even exist anymore.

So, why do I still blog?

Because maybe once a week I get an e-mail from someone who has been reading my blog. Maybe she can't figure out how to get to her first meeting. Maybe he can't figure out how to ask someone to be his sponsor. Maybe she can't figure out how to tell her sponsor she "accidentally" had a "slip." Or sometimes it is someone thanking me for writing every day because they somehow happened upon my blog before they ever got to their first meeting. And somehow they found my blog helpful (how my writing about my running, baking pies, migraine headaches, and other stupid things is helpful I don't really know, but it seems to be to some folks), and got the idea that AA might work for them. And Willa. She doesn't have a blog, but she has been coming by for over 3 years. Over three years ago, she would come by and leave a comment telling me how many days sober she had. And then she celebrated a year of sobriety. A few months ago, she celebrated 3 years. And she still comes by. And that makes my heart happy. Then there is Wendy. She and I "know" each other from another blogging venue, but she is sober now a couple of years and it is wonderful to read her comments... and her blog... when she blogs... which is not often anymore.

And then there are the wonderful blogging people I have met. The amazing thing to me is that when we meet, there is no shock. There are no surprises. These are the people I read every day. I have a pretty good idea of who they are, because they actually share that here. They aren't writing pretty crap every day. They are writing real stuff. We are not member of a mutual admiration society... we don't just come by every day and leave comments saying "beautiful," "profound," "oh, this is just what I needed to hear today," etc... we actually READ what they write and comment on that. Sometimes we actually say things that are meaningful.

When I started blogging, it was so much fun because none of you knew me. Then my blog got found by people I actually know. And family. And now I have to edit every word. I have to think about who I might hurt if they read it. It was a heck of a lot more fun when it was read only by strangers and there was no danger of hurting anyone. I used to write about things that no one knew about. Now I guess everyone does if they have read my old archived stuff. Dammit!!!

So, these are the reasons I blog. I think I have also basically told you the reasons why I don't like it so much too. But I think in the end, I love it more than I don't.

And, since I want an ode written to me, I would like to bestow this award on Pammie. I would love to hear Pammie tell us why she blogs.