Sunday, July 09, 2006

Sunday Afternoon

Thanks for the nice comments yesterday and today. I hope that in time I will stop this and get back to being myself. For now, I am having a hard time with my son leaving. A son going to war is not something I would wish on anyone. He is leaving tomorrow.

Tonight we are having lasagna. This is his traditional birthday menu. Ever since he was 4 years old and able to articulate what he wanted for dinner, it has always been lasagna for his birthday. I thought that in the 26 intervening years he might have changed his mind, but he hasn't. No, it isn't his birthday, but he won't be home in August when it is his birthday, so I thought I would jump the gun and celebrate a little early.

I did go to school today. I was blown away by the support I got from my instructor. She told me not to worry about the assignments I didn't get done. I am, after all, not even getting a grade in the class. But it goes so against my grain to not do something I commit to do. (because that is old behavior for me.) I told her this today and she just smiled and said "I know". Thank God she was one of my instructors in graduate school and does know me.

I got a wonderful long e-mail from my sweetie today. I thought that maybe my absence during my son's presence would be the end of the budding relationship, but apparently not. That is nice to know.

I ran 3 miles this morning before school. I don't know why I have to tell you all my work-out schedule, but I think it makes me more accountable for my training. My triathlon is in 4 weeks. That means 3 more weeks of training and the last week is to taper and rest up and get ready. I think I might actually be ready this year. I am very excited about it.

I also think it is fairly amusing that most of you probably think I am just a regular old jock. But that is so not the case. I will have to write about this journey because it is really something. A few years ago I weighed over 200 lbs., and could barely do anything because of my incredibly bad neck, and then the surgery to fix it. Yesterday I went to Ann Taylor and Talbots just to try on size 10 pants, because I knew I could fit into them... and sure 'nuff - I DID! (and yet, I didn't buy any... wow... I am really getting better!)

"So to you out there - who may soon be with us - we say "Good luck and God bless you!" -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 121


Scott said...

MC, you are truly inspiring to me... I have been feeling a bit weepy today, I shouldn,t... heck my wife is home from a week in AZ... I feel for you with your son, evne thoughI can hardly wrap my mind around what you're going through... I just love the lasagna story, the whole thing really got to me.
I am inspired by your workouts and your triathalon prep. Two yrs ago I went from 261 lbs to 200 lbs over 6 mo via eating well and walking almost daily. Well suffice it to say I am now the proud owner of most of that weight... I eat liek crap cuz it Makes me feel good as I swallow... and I have lost nearly all interest in working out. I still dont drink or do drugs and I am cigarette free for over 5 yrs now. I sure hope I can use your working out as an inspiration to help get my arse in gear... Like everything else, I will when I am ready, just keep logigng in your workouts, I need to read about it, lol!!

Hang in there with your son, I am praying for you all... Let him know that he has a friend in Ohio wishing him well over there...

peace to you all...

Sober @ Sundown said...

I don't know of any jocks that are into shoes as much as you are..........

AAwoken said...

I am constantly amazed at the level of kindness I receive when I speak honestly and from the heart and ask someone for help or understanding. One of the great lessons I have learned in AA.

Regarding the being a jock.....You are! Us sedentary sloths can pick you out a mile away.

Regarding son.....well I can only pray for him and you as I cannot imagine what you are a going through.

Gwen said...

My girl who ran the NYC marathon has a similar story. Not exact but similar.

You inspire me. I use to be in really good shape. Having struggled the past few years with the anxiety (which is greatly improving) I have put on weight. About two years ago I did a 5K with my husband his sister and her husband. The extra weight was killing me to run with. I am carrying thirty extra pounds. I have not given up on myself. I do feel like it will come back around for me. I love to read your routine. Please keep posting as you do. It is really a good example. Thanks my sober sista friend ;)

dAAve said...

You are NOT a regular old jock.
You are a special middle-aged jock who has lost a whole lot of weight through diet and excercise while practicing these principles in all your affairs the best that you can.

Anonymous said...

MC , you are always so willing to share so much of your journey with us.Some feelings so personal some so liberating...some both.
I cannot imagine saying goodbye to my son if he were to leave for war.
Please know that while some people cannot convey thier support for you as a Mom in words, thier heart sends
you spiritual hugs and wishes not to worry too much.
Continue selfcare :)
As for you being a jock.I think you are someone who is grateful to have
a healthy body capable of many things,including a pair of size 10 how about that bikini?
Thanks for sharing ~
ps.I would like to read more about your transformation from living at 200 pounds.Sounds very inspiring!

DG - trudgingtheroad said...

MC, thank you for the stuff you share.

As for the workouts, do post them. I am glad you gave some background becaus ei was highly intimidated at first ;)

I am putting a bit more emphasis on my "physicality" (sort of like "spirtuality") Nothing like you, but I have been hiking a minimum of 3 days a week. Improved Diet etc. I am adding weight training this week.

Keep posting it is inspiring... especially when you throw a pizza in there every now and again LOL.

Diego said...

Old behavior is old behavior and does not cut it when it is still being practiced......I'll say a prayer for you and your son....

Da Gal said...

I appreciate your honesty and how open you are. You definitely serve as an inspiration to me. Please keep sharing your journey.

take gentle care and you and your son are in my prayers.