Thanks for the nice comments yesterday and today. I hope that in time I will stop this and get back to being myself. For now, I am having a hard time with my son leaving. A son going to war is not something I would wish on anyone. He is leaving tomorrow.
Tonight we are having lasagna. This is his traditional birthday menu. Ever since he was 4 years old and able to articulate what he wanted for dinner, it has always been lasagna for his birthday. I thought that in the 26 intervening years he might have changed his mind, but he hasn't. No, it isn't his birthday, but he won't be home in August when it is his birthday, so I thought I would jump the gun and celebrate a little early.
I did go to school today. I was blown away by the support I got from my instructor. She told me not to worry about the assignments I didn't get done. I am, after all, not even getting a grade in the class. But it goes so against my grain to not do something I commit to do. (because that is old behavior for me.) I told her this today and she just smiled and said "I know". Thank God she was one of my instructors in graduate school and does know me.
I got a wonderful long e-mail from my sweetie today. I thought that maybe my absence during my son's presence would be the end of the budding relationship, but apparently not. That is nice to know.
I ran 3 miles this morning before school. I don't know why I have to tell you all my work-out schedule, but I think it makes me more accountable for my training. My triathlon is in 4 weeks. That means 3 more weeks of training and the last week is to taper and rest up and get ready. I think I might actually be ready this year. I am very excited about it.
I also think it is fairly amusing that most of you probably think I am just a regular old jock. But that is so not the case. I will have to write about this journey because it is really something. A few years ago I weighed over 200 lbs., and could barely do anything because of my incredibly bad neck, and then the surgery to fix it. Yesterday I went to Ann Taylor and Talbots just to try on size 10 pants, because I knew I could fit into them... and sure 'nuff - I DID! (and yet, I didn't buy any... wow... I am really getting better!)
"So to you out there - who may soon be with us - we say "Good luck and God bless you!" -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 121