I was sitting in a 6:30 meeting this morning, and looked out the window and saw (another) freaking blizzard. My plan for today WAS to go to the meeting and then run for the first time since February 6. But it is snowing.
So I went out for a bagel with the girls. We took up the whole back room of a bagel joint. It was so nice. I think there were 12 of us there.
So here is my question du jour. A woman who has been in and out and in and out and in and out over the last three years has been doing very well for about the last month. She looks and sounds different than she did - you know that magic you see in a person... it is wonderful. Another woman recently drank and was talking about her fear about raising her hand and being honest about her relapse. The older "slipper" told her not to worry about what others thought, and said "F*** them if they can't take a joke." Another member, sober now 6 years and the self-appointed expert on any subject, who annoys me a little more each day, got all over her. Told her that Alcoholism isn't a joke and she should stop thinking it is.... on and on... she browbeat this poor woman. Another older woman and I intervened on her behalf -but the other person would NOT drop it.
So on the way out of the restaurant I wanted to talk to Ms. 6 years-expert-of-the-world and tell her to stop browbeating newcomers. My friend encouraged me to do so. But I thought I better sit on it for at least a day. I am tired and not really in the best place, I am not sure I would be able to deliver this message with love. In fact, I am pretty sure I wouldn't be able to.
Why can't we just be loving of one another? Why can't we just let newcomers be who they are? Why can't we just be on the same level playing field? No one is the expert in AA... we are all just sober, by the Grace of God, for today. Period. Why do we have to lord it over others?
In the words of one of my favorite philosophers:
"Can we all get along?"
Rodney King - May 1, 1992