A Tourist in My Own Town

This is the back of a mariachi band - taken with my iPhone... while dining at one of the strangest restaurants in the United States of America. My son's new father-in-law wanted to go - having been denied this event on a vacation to Denver with his grandfather when a young boy - now he insists on going. Oh, it was fun.

It was nice to see my son with his arm around his beautiful - and beginning to show her pregnancy - bride. Yes, I did just slip that little tidbit right into that sentence.

Three years ago on Memorial Day I was using every tool available to me to try to maintain my sanity - when he was in Iraq. The Memorial Day weekend might have been the worst time for me with all of the focus on blood of young men lost. It is not easy to acknowledge this when your fondest hope is for none of your beloved son's blood to be spilt. Oh, that was a long year.

And now, it is three years later. He is a newlywed. He and his wife are thrilled to be expecting a baby. All of the grandparents are thrilled. Including me.

You know, every minute of life isn't necessarily "good" when you are sober, but I am certainly grateful that I get to walk through each thing as a sober woman. I am grateful that I lived through the year he was gone - going to tons of meetings, sponsoring too many women, blogging here - and coping as best I could. I am grateful that I got to go to that crazy restaurant tonight and enjoy a pink lemonade. I didn't even consider until this moment what it might have been like had I tried to "enjoy" a frozen margarita... or two... or three... or four. Oh, I can easily see the dirty looks instead of the smiles and laughter. I can see the stupid jokes instead of asking others questions to try to get to know them better. I can imagine the loud mouth big shot-ism that comes with a few drinks. And I can easily imagine myself standing at a bar right now having a couple of beers and probably telling some poor soul how my family just doesn't appreciate me....

Oh, yeah, too bad I had to give all that up.

And now I shall go to bed - having been up since 3:30 a.m. I am tired. It was a huge day. And I think I have another huge one tomorrow. By the Grace of God...