Today I celebrate 23 years of continuous sobriety. On July 24, 1984, an entirely new life was given to me - in exchange for a drunken, shameful one. If I were capable of producing this myself, I would have done it years before I had been through what I had been through and hurt all the people I hurt. I believe that my sobriety is something I could never have earned. It is a gift, and all it takes is some gratitude and action... which I refuse to call "work". Work is scrubbing the floor or mowing the lawn, not the blessedly simple things that are asked of us in AA.
I am more grateful than words can say for my sobriety. But I want to say that each sober day is a miracle and a revelation. Enjoy each day. When I was sober 3 years, I may have wished for 23 years, but I am glad I enjoyed being 35 instead of 55 - and all that was going on in my life at that time. Each day is a gift.
When I was fairly new in sobriety, I heard someone say that the only way we "win" this game is to die sober. I thought that was pretty harsh. But I think it is the truth. This is not a competition to win. This is a life to live. If the only way to win is to die sober, I guess I want to win, but not bad enough to die. So I will relish each day and hope that each sober alcoholic does the same.
Thank you for your love. Blogging has added a lot to my sobriety. Those of you I have met hold very very special places in my heart, and I hope to meet more of you as we all trudge the Road of Happy Destiny.
"May God bless you and keep you - until then." -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 164