I didn't get home until 10:30 last night, so I slept in until after 7 o'clock this morning! Then I went to church, and got to listen to a beautiful choir and a wonderful sermon and got a taste of why people probably like to go to church on Sunday morning, but not at the crack of dawn. I usually go on Saturday night or as early as I can on Sunday morning.
Yesterday afternoon I went up to visit my daughter at rehab. I drove and my daughter's ex-husband and boyfriend came with me. One would think that would be uncomfortable, but it wasn't. We were all three very encouraged about how Megan is doing. But I, of course, had a strange reaction to this. I just wanted to go home. And cry. I don't want to let my heart have that much hope. But I do.
It is a wonderful facility in the mountains. There were elk on the grounds (there is a hard to see picture of one above, between the two front-most buildings), fish and salamander in the pond, and lots of people getting sober - at least for now.
When we pulled onto the grounds, her ex said "oh, there she is, in the red pants, playing football!" What? That is just so wrong on so many levels. Red pants? My daughter in red pants? Playing football? When did she ever play with a ball of any sort? When did she ever have a sunburn (since she was a child)? When did she ever look so healthy? And happy? And to see all of her peers and the staff there, the way they interacted. I just wanted to go home and let what is working work. Not insinuate myself into the process. Just go home and pray. I will do my job and light candles and pray.
But she wanted me there. Bob and Ted (yeah, really - those are their names) wanted me there. We got to eat a lovely prime rib dinner together and then attend an AA meeting. I am so grateful that she is doing well. I keep reminding myself that people get sober every day. They get sober and stay sober every day. People who have been relapsing for years one day change and they get sober and stay that way. This happens all the time. It can happen.
This morning the sermon at church was about, among other things, letting go of worry and trusting in God. I think I will try to do that today.