Sunday, March 22, 2009

Front and Center

This morning I took a stroll around the garden in my pajamas to take any photos that might be hiding.  Do you see those tiny little lilac buds?  How sweet is that?  Very.

I woke this morning without the headache.  How sweet is that?  Very.

I need to be ready to go to church in an hour, so I need to make this quick.  How sweet is it that I get to go to church with the woman who has asked me to be her sponsor for confirmation (a.k.a., Godmother)?  Very, Very sweet.

So for some reason, while reading the Grapevine last night, I was reminded of something told to me early on and kept with me all these years.  

I was told to sit up front and center when at a meeting of AA.  Not to sit in the back row, or on the sideline, or any of the other places where you can quietly creep out without being noticed.  For those obvious reasons, but also because I need to know that:

When I am at an AA meeting, I am NOT a SPECTATOR.  I BELONG there.  

When I was sober about 10 years, I relayed this to a man who was sober about as long as I was.  He told me that the principle of rotation also applied to this.  He said that when I take a seat up front, I am taking that seat away from a newcomer.  I pondered this for a while.  When the man who told me this got drunk, it took on a bit of a different meaning to me.  I have tried to be mindful that I am not depriving anyone of a "good" seat at an AA meeting, but I have not moved to a back row or a sideline because I am sober for so long that I have become a spectator.

I still BELONG there.  

Thank God.

Have a great sober Sunday.


Pam said...

I have an "issue" of always sitting in the same place at the different meetings I attend. I get all floopy in my stomach when I see someone sitting in "my chair".
I have actually asked people to move down one.
Now, I make sure I'm at a meeting 30 minutes ahead of time so that I can sit in MY place. Sometimes I'm the only one in the room, but I feel HAPPY that I have the right chair.
How freakin' sick is that?? LOL

Ed G. said...

How nice that we can all "belong"...

The thing I did to earn my place is drink myself to the verge of death and then give up...

Nice post - glad to hear of your improved circumstances...

Hope said...

Yesterday was my birthday meeting. We set up many more chairs than normal because birthday meetings tend to bring more people. As people came in they sat in the chairs away from the tables we normally gather around. A newcomer, sober a few months came and sat down beside me. She looked around and asked me if the chairs at the table were reserved because everyone was sitting along the sidelines. I said no and for the rest of the meeting there were more empty chairs right up close and personal than full ones. The rest were on the edges. So thank you for this. I will take it with me that I am not a spectator. I belong. Thank God.

dAAve said...

How sweet are you?

steveroni said...

I am HALF as "freakin' sick" as Pam. Of the two meetings where I 'belong' each morning, only one do I get there early (For the second one--well, I'm already there -grin!)

MC, you still BELONG there!
And you still BELONG here! (My opinion.)

Trailboss said...

I am so glad your headache was gone this morning. Speaking from someone who suffered with migraines for way too many years I know what a relief it is when they leave.

Pam...I have been known to tell people in the breakroom to MOVE from MY chair. I have been called a bitch but I don't care. They are in MY chair! hahahaha

Scott W said...

I have my seat in room #3 and it makes me feel secure when I sit there. The same chair where I have heard so much from those sharing, where I have garnered insights, where I have felt so loved I thought my heart would burst. But if someone is sitting there it gives me a chance to sit in the back "some are sicker than others" corner chair. It's a joke we have. I have said the rooms seems tilted when people are not in 'their' chairs.

The Pet Shop Boys have an album titled "Very" and it is one of my very most favorite albums ever.

Syd said...

We have a round table discussion so there is no sitting up front. I have always liked to sit in meetings, restaurants, etc. with my back to the corner. Maybe it's the Wild Bill Hickock syndrome--at least I'm not holding aces and eights.