Saturday, August 15, 2009

A belly full of booze...

Let me ask you all this... I am watching a phenomenon that seems to be new to me. I wonder if I have just been blind and not noticed this before. Or maybe it is just my group. I don't know what it is, but it concerns me.

In your groups are there people who are not sober? Like they are drunk and they just "keep coming back?" Drunk. At meetings. After meetings. Before meetings. I swear I don't remember this happening a lot before.

How do you 12 step someone who is sitting in an AA meeting, goes to meetings regularly, and has a sponsor? Drunk.

What do you do when you are watching someone die?

I know we cannot help everyone. But honestly, if someone is going to meetings regularly and has been for years, couldn't they hear something that would convince them to do the rest of the stuff we have to do? Or maybe it is like Pammie says - there are people who just need to go to meetings and hang out a bit - and maybe they sponsor other people who need a spiritual experience or they are doomed to an alcoholic death.

Have you seen situations like this? Please tell me you haven't.

13 comments:

dAAve said...

I rarely notice if anyone has been drinking, maybe just 4 or 5 times in my 6 years of going to AA.
But even those few times, those people offer me a valuable lesson.

Dharma Kelleher said...

I just remember that could me. I offer a prayer for their healing and of gratitude for my sobriety.

Mike Golch said...

Luckly for me that has not happend/or I did not notice. I am glad that A)if it did happen that I do as I do at every meeting.offer a silent prayer for every one at the meeting hears a good message.
B) try to remember but for the Grace of God go I.

Scott W said...

I have never experienced anyone with any significant length of sobriety being drunk at a meeting. People that slip over and over, yes. Newcomers, yes. It would be easy for me to not notice because people are so damned weird.

Findon said...

It happens occasionally over here. They are like a moon to some, pulling in to their circle the ones who don't want to stay sober eother. I stay away from them as I have realised over many years that it is no use talking to them whilst they still have the bottle. They are an example though and I tell my sponsees to watch and learn. Sadly, that often means that this disease kilss.

Pam said...

Well I have seen newcomers drunk and I've seen people pick up chips, who were drunk. There is a group I go to sometimes that seems to have a resident drunk but they won't let him share unless he's sober. I doubt an active drinker would want to sponsor someone.
I'd have to pass him a note saying "if you are hoping meetings are going to get you sober, you're in for some disappointment."
Maybe he's coming for some "hope".

Lou said...

I don't know since I've only been to a few open AA meetings, but I can certainly see it happening.
And I agree with ScottW..some of the people are so weird it is hard to tell if they are drunk or not!

GeorgiaSnail said...

I went to meetings for two years before I "got it". I would drink before, sometimes i would leave a meeting and go straight to the bar. I remember using in the of our clubhouse...Then one day I was granted that great gift of clarity nd "got it"...that was Jan. 28th 2007.

wendy said...

A short answer: yes.

I always thought it happened down here because of all the treatment centers and halfway houses, but there are regular meeting attendees that come drunk and/or on pills.

My significant other has done this over the course of our relationship. We were not together for a month or so and he was using and going to meetings and going through the motions. Eventually he started over, but it was so weird to me that he was going to meetings and not getting or staying sober.

I'm just stubborn, I guess. I think the last place I'd want to be if I were drunk was an AA meeting.

Paula said...

I went to a few AA meetings. New and insecure but highly surprised to find so many drunks there. Hsnt changed yet, however normally I stick to my Al Anon meeting. Hugs across the pond

Susan M DeAngelis said...

I was at a meeting about 4 years ago... the woman was so wasted -- talking loud and stinking of booze. My sponser, at the time, asked me to drive her home after the meeting. While I was driving her home she would sporadically curse me out...

It was quite the experience I will never forget.

Syd said...

My wife tells me it happens and I've seen it at a couple of open meetings. One fellow actually had a bottle in his pocket, but that meeting is in a particularly bad part of town where there are many homeless and down and out folks. I've seen weird behavior at meetings too. I learn that the disease is alive and well and ready to take people down to the depths of hell if they let it. Every day I pray for the sick and suffering. That includes myself.

Ed G. said...

In the course of my time, I've seen it occur occasionally, then a lot and then not at all for a while. We seldom go a full month without someone at our newcomer's meeting reeking some of booze. Usually not the same person multiple weeks but, as I said, it has happened some.

Our best conscience has been "where better a place for them to go?" - so we just tolerate it. I don't go out of my way to hang with them while they're drunk but, sometimes it just seems like it's my turn and I wind up with them after the meeting or at coffee with them.

When I'm in a good place, they can be entertaining or I can feel useful. When I'm not in a good place, I get to learn tolerance...

Blessings and aloha...