Tomorrow I have an appointment with my psychologist. I am going to do some specific therapy for PTSD. I am increasingly having problems with "retraumatization" when dealing with sexual assaults (which I have to do in my line of work). It is interfering with my ability to do my job. It is interfering with some other stuff too. I am very nervous about this appointment tomorrow.
So, the way I like to deal with unpleasant things: I like to think of something else. Yesterday I found a gorgeous pair of diamond stud earrings. They were on sale, but still rather extravagant for me. I really congratulated myself for not buying them on the spot, but I have thought about them all day today. I have wanted beautiful diamond stud earrings all my life. I look at women with them and know that they are loved. I don't care if I have to be the one who loves me enough to buy them... I would like to have them.
So today, I got to work and discovered that there is a proposal to close half the hospital. That is ominous. How small can it get before it makes no sense to have a hospital at all? So, do I act conservatively and not spend a cent or do I get these earrings while I can? And best case scenario, I am definitely taking a bit of a cut in pay.
I know this has nothing to do with the primary purpose of my blog, but indulge me, I am in need of serious subject changage today. Here's a survey: