Sunday, April 11, 2010

Cinnabun

I edited this poor little doggy's eyes, so they look a little funky. They were bright blue though - which looked even more funky. He is just the dearest little thing. I have no idea how to care for a dog... all you dog people say - oh just pet him. Ha! I let him out into my back yard, and he is so small he can fit through the slats in my fence. On one side is a mean old cat who would tear him apart, and on the other side are two huge dogs who frighten me half to death. So I stand outside with him and warn him every time he looks like he would like to slither through the slats. It's funny how we become old women despite our best intentions. The one thing I do understand though is that on the weekends we both like to sleep. He curls in next to my side like a cinnabun. I think I shall miss him when he leaves at the end of today.

Yesterday I ran into a woman in the parking lot of the grocery store. She is a chronic relapser. When she first came to our group a couple of years ago, she had a high functioning job, a husband, two lovely pre-teen children, a very nice suburban home, and a horrible drinking problem. The only thing she has left of all those things is the horrible drinking problem. She had recently been sent away for months of "treatment" by her husband -and served divorce papers. As long as she was confined, she had been sober. As soon as she was not confined it seems she started drinking again. She explained to me all of the "reasons" she was drinking again.

I told her I don't understand "reasons" to drink. You have either had a psychic change or you have not. If you have had a psychic change, there is not one thing external that can cause you to decide to drink. Only I can pick up that drink and put it to my lips. Only I can.

Only God can keep me sober. Only I can decide to throw that away.

Please dear God may I decide to be grateful for your grace again today, and then put that into action. I'm off to a meeting... and then another full day. I will do my income taxes today.... eeeeek!

14 comments:

Syd said...

Ahhhh MC, it could be possible that a little IG may be in your future. As far as care, I talk to my dogs, brush them, and love them. They are a joy.
It sounds like the woman hasn't found a spiritual solution. Very sad.

Patty said...

Oh, Mary, I know. I spoke to a woman last night who told me that her counselor told her that if she could get some sleeping pills that she will be able to stop drinking.

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

lol looks like the type to have an adventuring foot!

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

That little adorable dog looks like an adventurer.

I have been chatting ever so briefly with a young woman who continues to come in and out and in and out relapsing. She has been placed in my path more times than I can count and I just pray that she finds that final stop to the misery and fear! I pray that God give her every blessing and mercy because it guts me to see her come in and not get it.

Garykfc said...

Care for the dog like you whould a child. My two dogs taught me how to care for me son! :)

Mary LA said...

That dog sounds as if he is very happy and well-protected.

My heart goes out to that woman. That inner psychic change is so necessary.

Andrew said...

My heart also goes out to your friend. And I can so relate to her, having been a chronic relapser myself.

Those Italian Greyhounds are the most loving and gentle dogs I have ever seen. My friend in Florida has had one for years, and recently bought him a younger girlfriend.

Kim A. said...

One of our dogs is named Cinnabun. She is 96 pounds of cuddle. I worry about my dogs like I did my kids. Only the dogs listen to me.

♥namate♥

Pam said...

Reasons "why" from people...just exhaust me.

Ed G. said...

I get that either "you are one and you will die if you don't get a solution" works or it doesn't. They used to say "do you think you're really licked this time?"

I still say that today.

The remainder of the conversation goes differently depending on the answer.

There is another dog in my future some day.

Blessings and aloha...

PJ said...

So sad. Thanks for sharing about this woman's struggle. I sometimes forget how miserable the chronic relapsing was. You're so right -- unless and until the psychic change takes place, which is a spiritual change, she won't get it. I pray she's not one of the "hopeless cases," but if she's already lost everything and still hasn't stopped, you have to wonder. And, I agree with Pam. After a point, these people just suck away your energy and joy.

chitowngreg said...

Chronic relapsers are so sad. My wife had a sponsee who had been in and around the program for over 20 years, never getting in one full year! I think you're absolutely right about the spiritual awakening!

Anonymous said...

I've noticed the dog does not wear a collar. I hope your son will get a collar with a dog tag that provides the dog's name, phone number and home address. I cannot tell you how many strays I come upon that do not have any information and because of that I am not able to make sure they are returned home safely. Two things I love most, running and my dogs.

Adrian

Scott said...

that gal sounds alot like how my wife used to be... I am grateful that she has experienced the psychic and spiritual change.

The IG is so handsome :-)