Monday, January 04, 2010

Way too tired

I probably shouldn't try to write anything when I am this tired, but I will.

I was going to write more about sponsorship, but I am really too tired. I thought it was interesting that another blogger had a sponsor who was having her do all kinds of wacky psychotherapy kinds of things that had nothing to do with any kind of program - in other words, the sponsor was practicing some kind of medicine or voodoo without a license. Thank God our friend fired her, and got another sponsor.

The comments on her blog amazed me though. About "a better fit" and "being comfortable." What?

It is not about a better fit or being comfortable. It is about getting someone to help you to do the steps. Not an amateur practitioner of whatever. Just the steps.

In the program of Alcoholics Anonymous, we have "conference approved literature." People love to scoff at that term. It is easy to look down on it as if we are too narrow minded to read anything that doesn't have the AA seal of approval on it. That is hardly what this means. It is literature that is really AA. Not someone's opinion (like my blog for instance). It seems that about one in three alcoholics who stays sober for more than 14 months thinks they ought to write a book about it - and then as a result there are all those books written by people - likely now drunk. Full of their wonderful nonanonymous wisdom and sage advice.

In the wonderful last words that Dr. Bob ever said to Bill W....
"Remember, Bill, let's not louse this thing up. Let's keep it simple!' -- Dr. Bob and the Good Oldtimers, p. 343

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for that Mary Christine I am amazed that a lot of members don't read the black bits of our programme only the white bits

Kim A. said...

I'm a BIG believer is keeping Alanon..Alanon. One way is by sharing why we have CAL to the newcomer. My sponsor uses A.A.'s Big Book as a tool, especially in understanding the disease, but made it very clear to me that it was her personal choice. I choose to use it too but keep it outside the rooms.

Keepin it simple..
Namaste

Pam said...

Sometimes I think that "keep it simple" is just to difficult a concept to lots of people.

dAAve said...

Last week, I nominated someone to chair some meetings for January and she politely declined, stating that her sponsor told her not to chair meetings because it might be too much pressure on her.
Amazing.

Lou said...

I personally feel that AlAnons over analyze. I see that on other blogs, and felt it with some comments. At some point you make a decision..and live with the consequences. Not every aspect of my life needs the input of a sponsor, who is basically another struggling human being, just like me. I want to make decisions based on common sense, instinct, and morals. AlAnon is another tool, I'm glad for it. It got me to a place I wanted to be faster and with less damage.

My father has been dead for over 25 years. I simply will not hold him responsible for my character defects. It serves no purpose, and was the last straw with my sponsor.

Reading your blog, Patty, Pammie, Syd, and a few others helped me know there was something very wrong with what I was being told. I would have figured it out myself eventually, but the input was invaluable.

Syd said...

I believe that no matter how many times I tell sponsees what I am--a guide for the steps, a person who shares their E, S, and H on the steps--they still want a therapist or someone who will make right their life. I can't do that and tell them that repeatedly. I appreciate your straightforward approach here.

Scott said...

AA is a simple program for complicated people... that's why we have to keep our message simple with newcomers :-) nice post MC!

Ed G. said...

Nicely said - and, in my experience, the truth.

Blessings and aloha....

Scott W said...

And not someone you call ONLY when you are in trouble.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
mike said...

thanks for the blog.
I am certainly a supporter of AA and the message it brings. I can tell you that I don't work a perfect program, nor do I do everything they tell me.
Keeping it simple and keeping it real regardless if you follow all the suggestions is what it is about.

Mary Christine said...

Yeah, "Mike" at $400 a day, I am sure no one has any interest in you getting well.