Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Still too tired...

No good reason to post this photo, but I took it, so therefore, I will post it... Love the tanning bed. I know it is wrong, but I am weak.

I am still too tired. I had a headache all day. I am trying to wait until 7 p.m. to go to bed. Is that ridiculous or what?!

I spoke with my sponsor this morning. She was home from the hospital, but may be going back. I wish I didn't know what I know about pathophysiology, I might be easily convinced that what she has is not a big problem. But having written up more than one death review of people who have died from this condition, I am not taking this lightly, and I know that she is not either. As we got off the phone today, we told each other our "I love you's" and we both said "good-bye." It felt odd. I got off the phone and cried. (Am I ever going to have a day when I don't write "I cried?") Some day I am sure I will. I am hopeful that her condition will resolve and I know that she is too.

The good news is - I have a sponsor I love. She loves me too. She has helped me for nearly 15 years. We have both stayed sober for all of that time. She is 11 years older than I am and sober 11 years longer than I.

I would say that is, all in all, very good news. AA works when a person follows a few simple directions. And what a wonderful thing it is.

11 comments:

Unknown said...

I looked up what a blue aura means. It said the following, "BLUE AURA COLOR: Relates to the throat, thyroid. Cool, calm, and collected. Caring, loving, love to help others, sensitive, intuitive."

Somehow that just seems to fit. I will light my own candle for you both.

Namaste

Anonymous said...

I hope you get a good nights rest and feel better in the morning :)

Scott W said...

I hit the tanning bed today, too. It was REALLY cold until the lamps heated up!

Mary LA said...

You are going through such a stressful time -- go gently and get as much rest as you can.

Love to you

Mary LA

Lou said...

The tanning bed makes me cringe..sallow is in!

God Bless. January always has been a hard month to me.

Syd said...

MC, I also have a killer headache today and had one yesterday as well. Must be sinus stuff acting up. Anyway, I do hope that you feel better and that your sponsor will heal. The relationship with my sponsor is a special thing. I know that yours with your sponsor is also.

Ed G. said...

I'm sorry for your illness and your sadness. I hope both you and your sponsor's health improves today and every day. And, I hope you find at least one thing today that will make you happy and excited.

AA does work. (wink, wink)

Go with God.

Blessings and aloha...

Annsterw said...

I too am, a sucker for the tanning bed....it is my last remaining weakness.LOL I have help off for about a month now but I think with this horrible snow I need to get back desperately! Thanks for the reminder. :-)

The Second Road said...

I've never been to a tanning bed. After trying on my bathing suit for my trip to Puerto Rico next week, I'm considering hitting one today!

An island getaway needs to happen at this time of year, but at the same time, I'm pale and loaded from Holiday dinners and treats.

The Second Road said...

I've never been to a tanning bed. After trying on my bathing suit for my trip to Puerto Rico next week, I'm considering hitting one today!

An island getaway needs to happen at this time of year, but at the same time, I'm pale and loaded from Holiday dinners and treats.

Kathy M. said...

It's wonderful to have a sponsor you love and who loves you. And for so long. I'll keep you both in my prayers.