Tomorrow I shall be 56 years old. That is good. Although I wish I had the face and body that were mine when I was 26, I would not wish to have the mind and the raging active alcoholism that tormented me every day. I would not wish to be 36 again, even though I was sober at that time. It was a difficult time. I liked being 46. And I think I shall like to be 56. I hope to run my first marathon in 2008, at the age of 56. At the age my mother was when she was dying. I sometimes think how happy she would be to see how very alive her daughters are.
Today I woke with joy in my heart, thank you God! I said a prayer of thanks for my warm and comfortable bed. I jumped out of bed with a wish to go to the gym and run 3 miles on the treadmill, just like I used to. I am even looking forward to going to work, and I have not felt that way for a very long time. I did my prayer and meditation and actually felt the connection instead of just going through the motions, thank you God!
I could tell you what has made this difference, but it would take too long today. Maybe I will tomorrow. But I will say this much, it has not been about me getting my way, or "things" turning around. It has been about me turning my thoughts to others, and changing my way of thinking. And, as always, it has made all the difference in the world.
Here are the little gifts I have knit for people at work. I will bring them to work today. Each one is a little hand knit bowl - for paper clips. Each one will include a little package of colored paper clips. Silly, but people like them. I gave away a few yesterday.
Have a happy sober Friday everyone.