Wednesday, February 01, 2012
Don't Be Rash
This morning instead of sitting at my computer, I got on the treadmill and ran a couple of miles. After I was done running, I had to move as fast as I could to get ready and get out of here on time. But I did it. And that was good.
Intellectually I can know that exercising will give me more energy, but when I am bone weary, the last thing I want to do is exercise.
So, I worked for 10 hours today and spent nearly 2 hours on the bus, but I still feel alive tonight. I am about to sit down and do one of my favorite things in the universe - yes, American Idol!
Can I ask you all a question? What do you make of a person who is sober for quite a few years who is still having a crisis a day? As a sponsor I have walked her through the work, listened to her, suggested everything I can, and still every day, the same old, same old. She seems to have a spiritual awakening about every other day. But the next day it is gone.
I honestly cannot relate. I have lived through crises, but I always found a way to be grateful. I learned to turn my thoughts to others and get on with life. Whether I liked my circumstances or not.
I don't get it - last night it was because her husband gave her daisies instead of roses for an anniversary present. Really? You have a husband? He buys you flowers?
I feel bad for her and I do really like her. But I am at a loss. My sponsor told me to drop her probably a year ago. My boyfriend suggested I drop her about 6 months ago. I don't want to hurt her, but I don't seem to be helping her. I am baffled here.
OK, I gotta go watch Idol.
Thanking God today for big and small things. A great new challenging job. A daughter who makes me so proud I could burst. Clean buses. Nice downtown restaurants. A boyfriend who calls me just for fun. A pair of green socks I am knitting. A green chair to sit in and a TV with a favorite show on it.
And I am sober to enjoy all these things.
God is Good! And he must love me lots!