Wednesday, February 01, 2012

Don't Be Rash

WTH is this?  I am covered with this rash!   I am going to ignore it tonight and see what it looks like in the morning.  Jeez Louise.

This morning instead of sitting at my computer, I got on the treadmill and ran a couple of miles.  After I was done running, I had to move as fast as I could to get ready and get out of here on time.  But I did it.  And that was good.

Intellectually I can know that exercising will give me more energy, but when I am bone weary, the last thing I want to do is exercise.

So, I worked for 10 hours today and spent nearly 2 hours on the bus, but I still feel alive tonight.  I am about to sit down and do one of my favorite things in the universe - yes, American Idol!

Can I ask you all a question?  What do you make of a person who is sober for quite a few years who is still having a crisis a day?  As a sponsor I have walked her through the work, listened to her, suggested everything I can, and still every day, the same old, same old.  She seems to have a spiritual awakening about every other day.  But the next day it is gone.

I honestly cannot relate.  I have lived through crises, but I always found a way to be grateful.  I learned to turn my thoughts to others and get on with life.  Whether I liked my circumstances or not.

I don't get it - last night it was because her husband gave her daisies instead of roses for an anniversary present.  Really?  You have a husband?  He buys you flowers?

I feel bad for her and I do really like her.  But I am at a loss.  My sponsor told me to drop her probably a year ago.  My boyfriend suggested I drop her about 6 months ago.  I don't want to hurt her, but I don't seem to be helping her.  I am baffled here.

OK, I gotta go watch Idol.

Thanking God today for big and small things.  A great new challenging job.  A daughter who makes me so proud I could burst.  Clean buses.  Nice downtown restaurants.  A boyfriend who calls me just for fun.  A pair of green socks I am knitting.   A green chair to sit in and a TV with a favorite show on it.

And I am sober to enjoy all these things.

God is Good!  And he must love me lots!


Mary Christine said...

Testing, 1, 2, 3...

Anonymous said...

Mary, I dont know what that rash is, but last spring my hands broke out like that during finals week.

I am so glad that you got to run this morning, even if it was indoors on the treadmill.

My Rx for the sponsee is service work and a sponsee of her own! One day my sponsor said this to me, "Did you know that God did not put your husband on this earth to make YOU happy?"

Syd said...

Sounds as if she may need to do some more inventory. Some people seem to crave drama.

Hope that the rash goes away. Take care of yourself.

Mary LA said...

Yay for the green socks! And I hope your rash goes away.

I've found that some people get into a pattern of complaining or creating dramas that they can't shift easily and she may benefit from working with someone else for a while.

Hope this posts.

Annette said...

The rash looks like petechiae to me. I had it when I was pregnant (which I'm not suggesting is your situation) and I was really anemic. Or maybe its stress related?

Good luck with the sponsee. Sometimes we have to detach with love even from our sponsees who chronically refuse to embrace the change in their lives that would set them free from daily crisis.

Joker the Lurcher said...

my guess with the rash is soap powder or maybe new clothes which have something in them. i've had it from a new shirt - you could tell it was the shirt as the rash was shirt shaped!

hope things settle down - you inspire me every day but i rarely comment. hugs

shadowlands said...

the rash is hopefully the sign of something on it's way out, not in.

As for the woman and the flowers, I would have burst out laughing and told her to go 'tip toe through the tulips' and complain to the God who made them! The daisies I mean. Hahahahahahaha!!!

Mindyou, on second thoughts, she may then end up with your rash.... ;)

dAAve said...

Sounds like your sponsee has a lot of unfulfilled expectations. There's been a rash of that going around lately.

Pammie said...

Oh some sponsees drive me crazy too. I'm glad you got to run on something, I know it helps you so much.

Anonymous said...

We have had the rash at our house from new soap powders. Think of anything new you have used.

I know I would not be a good sponsor, do I don't go there.

Debbi said...

I think you answered your own question when you said:

"I don't want to hurt her, but I don't seem to be helping her."

You may not be the right person for her, and you sure don't need to add to your stress these days. Take good care of you ...

Ms Jones said...

Good Morning,
I have sponsored a few woman that absolutely feel and see the fruits of HIS labor quickly. However, for the "others" I can honestly say I was one of those. I cried everyday for over a year. I didn't want to drink but found sober life exhausting. At about 2.5 years sober I went to the doc. Found that I had somehow slipped into menopause while I was drinking and did not have a clue. so with proper diet, meds and excercise my tears have stopped and I am able to say I am a happy sober woman.

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

I had a weird rash last week after my 7 days of running like a banshee doing my job on site at the conference. I decided it must have been stress cause it went away after 24 hours. Hope yours does too!

I had a sponsee for a while who was up and down up and down up and down... she moved so she did find a new sponsor, but I still hear from her every once in a while, she's kinda blown by the wind.

I'm grateful that the wind still blows but I'm not as susceptible to the changes knocking me for a loop.

She's pissed that she got daisies instead of roses? WTH? She does seem to have an affect on you though doesn't she?