Monday, February 06, 2012

Two Things

This is a photo from last summer.  
In my experience, there are two attitudes that are a harbinger of lasting sobriety.  They are Gratitude and Responsibility.

In AA, we learn to be grateful for whatever comes down the pike.  We learn to find what is good in any situation.  I'm not saying we are grateful that Aunt Edith died, but while attending her funeral we may be very grateful to see our long-lost cousin or some other thing.  We may actually thank God that we have lost a job when we find another - or when we learn to be humble and not so greedy.  I don't think this is a natural attitude for an alcoholic, it is something that becomes a good habit.  Like any good habit, it takes a bit of work to get there.

When I see a newly sober person still blaming - the courts, the judge, the spouse, the parents, the kids, whoever or whatever - I see a person who isn't "getting it."  A person who is likely to stay sober is one who will focus on their own side of the street - taking responsibility for their actions.  Digging deep in inventory to find the root causes of dysfunction.  "Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened?  Though a situation had not been entirely our fault, we tried to disregard the other person involved entirely.  Where were we to blame?  The inventory was ours, not the other man's."  (Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 67)

So, that's been my observation over the years.

And now I need to get out of here to go to an AA meeting before I get to work.  I am working from home today with one meeting on the grounds of my old workplace in the middle of the day.  I am looking forward to the whole day.

I am thanking God that I am a sober woman who is capable of gratitude and responsibility.


7 comments:

Sober Julie said...

I totally agree and the spiritual solution was the only way I could truly comprehend these...

Have a great day!

Annette said...

Love it MC, very true.

dAAve said...

Sorry about Aunt Edith.

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

amen

Lou said...

Aunt Edith brought the family together again!

Syd said...

Loving that Aunt Edith--maybe she was the only one who truly got it.

Lulu said...

So sorry for your loss ~ and many thanks for reminding me about my oh so unhelpful blaming habit. It's taking a while to turn around this long-standing alcoholic reaction, but I'm getting there.

And endless thanks for that photograph! I adore my life-long urban home, but I would just love to experience nature like that!