Crocuses in the garden
Buds on a lilac bush.
Buds on a lilac bush.
It is a beautiful day. I woke up somewhat late and decided not to hop straight out of bed and get to a meeting as I usually do. I am taking it slow this morning. Yesterday after the meeting, I went to the lake and ran 10 miles. Running 10 miles can make a person tired.
I am trying to be cheerful here, but I just feel dishonest. I am feeling creeped out because I just got slimed again by the very ill person who is commenting and e-mailing most of us. I think many of you can just dismiss him as a "nut" and delete, delete, delete - and report as spam. Part of this stage of my recovery is that I no longer can label people as "toxic" or "nuts" or whatever. I used to get away with that, but I can't any more. In this man's case, I may have to make an exception. His tirades are particularly hurtful to me because I am, I hope, not only spiritual (which I learned in AA), but because of AA, I have been able to return to my religion and that is as much a part of me as my legs or arms, or my heart. Believe me, it requires discipline not to write about it a lot, because as most of you know if you read this blog often, I spend a lot of time at my church and it is a very important part of my life. So I try to mention these things in a general way...
I don't write about my specific religion here because this blog is about AA. Many people get to this blog as a result of searches for info on AA. I feel an obligation to stick pretty close to traditions because of that (although I think perhaps the entire blog is a violation of the 11th tradition). The long form of the 11th tradition states:
"Our relations with the general public should be characterized by personal anonymity. We think AA ought to avoid sensational advertising. Our names and pictures as AA members ought not be broadcast, filmed, or publicly printed. Our public relations should be guided by the principle of attraction rather than promotion. There is never need to praise ourselves. We feel it better to let our friends recommend us." -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 567
Back to the 10th tradition, the long form of which is:
"No AA group or member should ever, in such a way as to implicate AA, express any opinion on outside controversial issues - particularly those of politics, alcohol reform, or sectarian religion. The Alcoholics Anonymous groups oppose no one. Concerning such matters they can express no views whatever." -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 567
If I had named my blog "Mary's excellent adventures" or some other thing and hadn't identified myself as an AA member and said that this blog was specifically about that, I don't think I would worry so much about this. But I did. So I feel I have to be careful, just in case I damage one alcoholic's tiny little chance to get to AA and stay sober.
Okay, I am being Ms. Buzz Kill.... I have possibly had too much coffee (2 cups!!!) and I haven't eaten yet. I will eat and later I will get out in the sunshine and take a bike ride. I love the fact that because of my adherence with some commandments, I get to take the day off!!!
"We have been speaking to you of serious, sometimes tragic things. We have been dealing with alcohol in its worst aspect. But we aren't a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life. We try not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations, nor do we carry the world's troubles on our shoulders." -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 132