Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Livin' on a Wednesday

This is the scarf I am knitting for my daughter-in-law.  Those colors don't look true, at least on my computer.  The color ranges from bright orange pink, to deep deep purple.  And some brownish rustish colors in between.  It has taken me well over a month to knit that much.  Her birthday was on Nov. 4, and I had to show her this incomplete project and tell her it would be done in a couple more weeks.  Sheesh.  I gave the baby an incomplete quilt for her birthday and I still don't have that done either!   I have a dear friend whose mother always wrapped unfinished knitted items for her birthdays and Christmas, and she has fond memories of this.  This gives me hope that I am not causing bad memories and trauma.

On Sunday I woke up from a nap with a strange pain that felt like a junior broken rib.  Not as sharp of a pain as a broken rib, but the same kind of pain in the same kind of place.  It has gotten worse each day this week.  I think I may have to go to the doc today - although even if it is a broken rib, they don't do anything for it.  Who gets a spontaneous broken rib (other than someone with advanced osteoporosis)?  Yesterday I was supposed to do 3 miles, I made it two very painful miles.  Oh dear, this cannot happen!

OK, I swear this is the last time I am going to talk about this most challenging sponsee.  But we talked yesterday and it put almost everything into perspective.  She thanked me for telling her to trust God and pray on Saturday.  She said she had a better day after that.  And she has been thinking about it.  Then she told me something that blew me away.  She said, "Thanks for being so patient with me.  My first sponsor was an atheist, so I have never heard this stuff before."

I thought about the fact that the big book is pretty clear about trusting an infinite God rather than our finite selves, etc.  But if no one guides you in this direction maybe you wouldn't go there?

One of the meetings I have gone to since I got sober has in their meeting format - read at the beginning of every meeting:
"if you hear anything here that cannot be reconciled with the first 164 pages of the big book, we suggest you disregard it."

I think that is pretty good advice, so for today, I will just say:

"Abandon yourself to God as you understand God.  Admit your faults to Him and to you fellows.  Clear away the wreckage of your past.  Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny.  May God bless you and keep you - until then."  -- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 164


dAAve said...

That's really cool.
I don't think there's harm in sharing our experience with sponsoring, as long as we respect anonymity.

Syd said...

I have done a lot of praying recently. Step 11 is in the forefront of my mind. And today was a glorious day with my wife. We had such fun. I just have to quit being a worrier and let life happen.

Pammie said...

"I have never heard this stuff before" Oh girl, I'll bet that gave you a big dose of encouragement!
I want to plop down on that comfy looking couch.

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

When you run across those people who have continued to stick around having been lead in a godless direction for a while, doesn't it just make the miracle all the more poignant?

The scarf looks beautiful!!!

Mary LA said...

I know many recovering atheists who are sober and contented -- but they all have a sense of mystery and the collective power of AA.

That scarf looks gorgeous.

Anonymous said...

I read your blog every day, though I don't comment. Thanks for your candor and honesty in writing. I also love the scarf - mind sharing the pattern source? Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I would love to know where I could find the pattern for that scarf. Would you mind sharing it?

Mary Christine said...

Dear Anon,
The pattern is available for sale here:
or you could shoot me an e-mail at: