Wednesday, August 25, 2010

One day in the life of this sober woman...

Just because I am too tired from it to think about anything else to write about.

I tried to get to work early today - but my 12 to 15 minute commute turned into a 45 minute commute. Complete with a three car accident just in front of me that I had to drive onto the shoulder to avoid. Then someone else tried to drive into me. By the time I got to work I was shaking. I wish all this construction would be over. It seems every road in this town is undergoing a major overhaul.

A long day at work. I just wrote three paragraphs about it and erased them. Who cares? I am gainfully employed and I am grateful for that.

When I got home, I noticed that I have a new rose in the garden at the back of my house. So, I snapped a photo. I have not taken care of my lawn and garden this year the way I normally do. I am just too tired from work, from training for a marathon, and from being a year older than I was last year. For the last month or six weeks, every Thursday when I get home from work, my lawn is freshly mown. My neighbor, bless her heart, asked me if I would mind if she mowed my lawn. Are you kidding? Mind? I am thrilled! I do feel guilt, so every time I bake or cook, I make extra for her. I have the best neighbor in the universe, and I think she kind of likes me too.

My daughter called tonight from a strange number. That always puts some fear in my heart. She has left her boyfriend (thank you God), but it is a very volatile and I think dangerous situation. I am frightened for her tonight. Tomorrow she will have the police come and supervise her move out of there (I forget what you call that, she told me, but I think there are some kinds of information that a mother's mind just doesn't have the velcro stick to). She has asked her old boyfriend (who I love) to help her, and he has. He always has. He has literally saved her life more times than I probably have an inkling of. I know of a few times though. I wish she wasn't staying with the one I don't like tonight though. She is bringing a girlfriend and claims that x-b.f. is afraid of her.

I have to remind myself that she is a sober woman. She has her own relationship with God. God is at work in her life, I know that.

I also know how many volatile situations I walked through in early sobriety. I must have scared people half to death with the things I did. I know I did. And yet, here I am, an old lady reminiscing about them, safe and sound in my own little home.

I can pray and trust God that it is the way it is supposed to be for right this moment. Tomorrow should be a different story.

It is good.

5 comments:

Syd said...

I hope that your daughter will be okay. Sounds as if she has a good plan to have a friend be there. Rest easy. She does have her own HP.

shadowlands said...

I will pray that Our Lady wraps her mantle around her, during this time.

Power to the powerless.

that girl said...

prayers for your daughter.

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

God be with her, and you, bringing just what you need and the peace that comes with the understanding that he has it all in the palm of his hand... he's so big he probably has us as a pin dot on the tip of his pinky...

I can't tell you the strength your shared experience and gratitude brings, but I'll try to always reflect it back out there too!

dAAve said...

It must be tough to be a mother.

I gues it's all part of the Total Entertainment Package.