Tuesday, September 06, 2011
Why a photo of my foot, you may ask. Well, there is something very strange about my foot, but I don't think you can tell. I am losing a toenail - again. I had just lost the nail on the second toe on the right foot a few weeks before the race in August. I thought I was all set to go. But I developed a terrible blister underneath the new toenail and unfortunately, that usually means you will lose the toenail. Usually there is a little nail under the toenail as it falls off - but there is nothing but skin under this one. I am hoping to keep the nail on for a little while longer. So I put a bandaid on it. And then I thought it looked funny, so I painted a little dab of nail polish on it in the shape of a toenail. And then I wonder why people think I am a bit peculiar....
Today is the 17th anniversary of my employment at the hospital. When I started, I said I wanted to work there until I retired. I think I may have recently changed my mind. I still have another ten years to work, I would like very much to be happy in those ten years. There is no point in grimly staying somewhere because I said I would. No one I said it to even works there anymore!
This determination has served me well in my sobriety, but I am learning it can be a character defect in other areas of my life. I remember a sponsor I had long ago who said when she got into a rut, she moved in the furniture and the rugs, got comfortable and just stayed there. She didn't stay sober.
I think I am ready to break out of some ruts in my life.
But I wouldn't consider sobriety a rut. I would consider it a blessing. And a discipline. And a beautiful habit. And I thank God for it every single day.