Monday, September 26, 2011
Monday Post Race
I didn't fall, I didn't break anything, I didn't obstruct the trail. It was a beautiful day. I am so glad I did this race. Even though my friend and I did come in last in the half marathon. I knew that would happen since this is a serious race... there are only real runners there. And then there was me. And although I love the big races with the old, slow, and fat people, because they are a lot more like me than my mind allows me to realize, and usually at least a couple of them will finish after me - it was awesome to be at a race that was an adventure!
At our meeting we have a man who has returned after a long absence - he is sober - but he has taken to interrupting people and telling them to wrap it up if they aren't talking about alcoholism. I wondered how often I talk about alcoholism in meetings. How often do I talk about alcoholism specifically here? Probably not very often.
But Being Sober, now, that is a whole different topic. And that is what I like to talk about. So, in case you need me to draw the parallel (which I know most of you don't), here it is.
When I drank, I ran most mornings. I ran a whole lot better than I do now. I was always gonna run this race or that race. I was always talking about it. But somehow I never got around to filling out a registration form and sending in some money. I never got to experience a race morning because I never followed through with much of anything.
When I was nearing 3 years of sobriety, I decided to participate in my first race. It was the 1987 Bolder Boulder 10K. I bought running shoes and a little running outfit to train in. I trained for the race. I registered for it. And on race day, I showed up and ran. I ran it with a cigarette and matches in the pocket of my little running shorts, but I ran it. As the runners finish the race, they run into Folsom Stadium at CU Boulder... there are people all around cheering. When I ran into that stadium on that day in 1987, I wept for joy. I knew those people weren't necessarily cheering for me - but they were cheering for me, because I was one of 30,000 people who had laced up their shoes that morning and gotten out and run. I had become someone who actually did things instead of just talking about them.
Slowly, slowly, slowly, life changes if you just don't pick up a drink - one day at a time. God can get to work on us if we let him. I am so incredibly grateful for what he has given to me and taken away from me in my life.