It is a beautiful November Saturday Morning. I just got done running 6.2 miles - yes a real 10 kilometers - at a trail around a nearby lake. It was awesome. When I got done, I broke down in tears. Luckily no one was around to see me sobbing. I was thanking God from the depths of my soul for the life I have today. Thanks to the Grace of a Loving God, I have been given Grace and Perfect Mercy, and not justice. If I got what I deserved, it would not be pretty.
I went to a meeting last night and another this morning. I said the same thing in both of them. I am so grateful for Alcoholics Anonymous. Last night an old friend from school called me to tell me about his really huge new job. He talked to me about a job in Northern California. I could not believe what came out of my mouth - I said I am not interested in a high power job right now.
All I want right now is to be a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, going to tons of meetings and doing what I am doing. I want to be around the people I love - in AA and my family. I want to be a member of my church. I want to continue to be able to run 5 times a week. I don't want to go off to a strange land for a high powered job with all the pressure that goes along with that.
So, although I have some pretty upsetting life circumstances right now, I feel freaking fantastic because these challenges have forced me to do what I am supposed to be doing. I am so grateful to be sober and to have a wonderful way of life and a wonderful fellowship to be part of.
"Our entire AA program rests upon the principle of mutual trust. We trust God, we trust AA, and we trust each other." -- As Bill Sees It, p. 310