Friday, February 06, 2009

Answered Prayer

Today I had a totally unexpected answer to a prayer.  An 18 year long prayer.

If you have read me for a while, you know that I gave birth to a baby girl child when I was 15 and gave her up for adoption.  If you want to read a post about that experience, go here.  We found each other when she was 20, and lost touch with each other not long after that.  The last time I spoke with her, it was 1990 and she was pregnant.  I have been trying to find her since then.  I figured she had gotten married and I would never be able to find her without her last name.  I wasn't sure if she knew my maiden name, which I took back after my last marriage.  I had pretty much lost hope that we would ever find one another.

Today I got an e-mail from her.  She found me via google search.  Of all things, she found me listed on the webpage for my HOA - thank God I didn't quit when I wanted to or my name and e-mail address would not have been there.  She wasn't real sure it was me, so she just told me her maiden name and asked me to contact her.  I sat at my desk at work and just started crying.  I said a prayer and picked up the phone to call her.  I left her a message.  She sent me another e-mail.

This e-mail had pictures of her.  And my 24 year old grandson.  24. year. old. grandson.  

And my 22 year old grandson.  22. year. old. grandson.

And my 18 year old granddaughter.  18. year. old. granddaughter.  

And in a twinkling, my family size nearly doubled.  I looked at pictures of these people.  Who look like me.  My daughter looks like my mother.  Or even more like my Aunt.  I think my brand new 18 year old granddaughter looks like me when I was a teen.  Lots of eye make-up, long hair, defiant expression on her face.  I can't even conceive of these people being my offspring.  And that they might actually want to have anything to do with me after our history.

My daughter called a little after 4, and we talked until 5.  Neither of us wanted to get off the phone.  She told me that she always assumed that I would find her if I wanted to because she thought I knew her adoptive parents' phone number.  I lost that many years ago and I wouldn't have had the nerve to call anyway.  She finally decided that she would make the effort and was able to find me right away.  I always have tried to be really transparent so that I could be found by her.  In fact, it is kind of funny that I kept my land line and a publicly listed phone number for years so that she could find me - I just got rid of that in November.  And she found me anyway.  

As we were hanging up, I put her name and number into my cell phone.  I marveled at the fact that I had her name.  And her number.  And we had found each other.   

I told her that I always feel like there is a hole where she belongs.  That every time someone asks me how many children I have and I say "three," I feel like I am lying.  She said "now you can say four."  

Now I can say four.  

I have four children.  Three daughters, ages 42, 29 & 29.  One son, age 32.  

I have five grandchildren.  Two grandsons, ages 24 & 22.  Three granddaughters, ages 18, 8, and 5.  

And when we hung up, she said "I love you Mom."

What a flaming miracle.

I was reminded of my friend Don C. who used to say "Everything works out if you just live long enough."  

I only know one way I could have lived long enough for this to happen... to stay sober, one day at a time, living by spiritual principles, and trusting that God knew what he was doing.  

Thank You God for your incredible love and healing.  


Pam said...

I can't even tell you how full my heart is at this moment my precious mary.
So many miracles linking together to make this moment happen.
Wonderful darlin'.
Just wonderful.

Hope said...

Well I'm a bawling mess now.
First Friday,too.
What a beautiful story of an abundance of Grace.
Sweet hugs to you tonight.

steveroni said...

Oh Mary, how honored I am to be reading this part of your life story. That you share it is prayerful and inspired. God has been good to you today.

I have a similar story that I will blog one day, in fact two of them, one a friend, the other a son.

I feel blest that God let me stay up this late so I could read this, and now go to bed with a smile on my face.

Sorry for blong comment. Thank you!
Steve E.

Anonymous said...

Tears in my eyes -- I remember reading your earlier post. What an extraordinary miracle, to reconnect with your daughter and to find you have grand-children. A miracle.

Anonymous said...

What a lovely gift. I'm very happy for you.

Akannie said...

Oh, MC...

What a miracle. I am tearful reading this.

I'm so happy for the both of you. For all of you.


Findon said...

Wonderful post. I'm really pleased for you.

Bill said...

I'm speechless. Well, nearly. As close to speechless as I get would be more accurate.
I got all tingly, snuffly, and joyful when I read this. It truly is a miracle. I am so happy for you.
This is a splendid example of more shall be revealed, isn't it? The rewards of sobriety just keep unfolding.

SerenitySeeker said...

Congratulations! I had a similar miracle happen to me years ago. I was given up for adoption and was told by my adoptive parents at an early age about it. What a hole that created. I tried to fill that hole for 20 years with booze. During those twenty years I searched and searched for her and never had even a clue. Six months after I got sober I came across her brother. He informed me that she had died years before but was survived by two children that were my half siblings. I have since been to her grave and made peace with it all and as a bonus I now have a relationship with the whole maternal family. Funny thing is that my new found brother and sister suffer from alcoholism too. My brother can never seem to get more than a few months sober but my sister got sober 3 weeks before me. The kicker is we grew up 700 miles apart! I like to think that the Lord waited for me to get my act together before he gave me the gift of a new family so I would really appreciate it. Funny how it works that way...never in my time but always in His!

Syd said...

MC, that is a miracle. I am very glad for you. I can't think of a better prayer to be answered. Bless you and your family.

wendy said...

an amazing story...thanks for sharing.

Pazzy said...

Wow, i have such goosebumps right now! I have no idea who you are and you don't know me, but I want you to know you have hit home with a total stranger - me. This is a miracle and i am sooooo happy for you!!!!!!!!!!!

Scott W said...

Wow. When things like this happen, all we have to do is say thank you. The miracles of sobriety are truly awesome. I know this will be one of the most healing events of your sobriety.

Sending big hugs.

J-Online said...

MC. I have goose bumps all over my body right now. What a miracle. I'm so happy for you and your family. What an awesome story, and a great reminder that God works miracles; we just have to be patient sometimes because as pammie would say "he is very old." Great way to start the weekend and very inspirational.

dAAve said...

Well, I didn't read this until this morning (Sat.) but I'm sure glad I did.
I'm speechless.

Trailboss said...

That is such an incredible thing. Thank you for sharing with us. I am so happy for all of you. So many memories to make from this day on.

Cat said...

How absolutely wonderful and touching and miraculous!!! I am so happy for you, for your daughter and for your grandchildren.

What a great thing to have happened, and I agree with Don C if you live long enough anything can happen!

*Ps. Next time post a Kleenex warning up for us bawlers! hehe

Indigo said...

I came by way of Pam...My heart just melted with this story. I'm so happy for you dear friend.

"Everything works out if you just live long enough." What truly profound words. So true, I've often asked why I survived for so long the way I did. That statement puts it all into perspective.

Thank you for sharing this beautiful post. (Hugs)Indigo

KarenR1213 said...

What a wonderful inspiring story! I adopted my children nine years ago, and got sober 6 years ago. They have little memory of me drunk.

I hope someday that I can take them to their country of origin, so that they might feel connected to their birth moms.

Zanejabbers said...

A definite example of a promise coming true - God is dooing for you..... This is a goood reason for dancing like no one is watching. (A friend of mine ends his email with that line.)

vicariousrising said...

What a beautiful, amazing story. I am so happy it happened to you. Much love to you, your daughter and your long lost grandchildren!

Lou said...

God is working in your life! I had a similar experience in finding my Dad's family, so I know how this feels. But finding a child (or vice verse) would be even more intense. How wonderful!

Scott said...

MC, ya about brought me to tears... what a beautiful life and situation... now you can say four... geeze I need a kleenex!
God Bless you and your big giant family! Thanks for sharing such a wonderful story with us!

Banana Girl said...

MC, I cried in NYC when I sat in the computer room of the hotel and read your story of this child. Today you made my circle of crying complete. So here I sit with tears and a faint smile and a warm glow and I know that you are thrilled, and happy, and full. What a miracle indeed! Thank you for reminding me of the emotions that my hubby must have when he thinks of his own adoption and his birth parents and his question marks of his origins. He is grateful for the life he has, but I do know that at times these holes are more visible to him than at other times. I am just so delighted and happy for you, mother of 4! The power of prayer cannot be denied. The timing of the answer is indeed not ours. Have a blessed wonderful Sunday! I know I will. My prayers at church will have a few more people added to them today because of you and the courage you share when putting this out on the porch of the web for the rest of us to see and learn from. It is like a beautiful pot of flowers and I just learned from you how to make them grow. And I wouldn't have known how unless I had seen them on your "porch." Thanks.....J.

Anonymous said...

Are these the Promises at work, Mary Christine?

"We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it."

This is indeed a miracle. I am awed and so happy for you!


Kathy Lynne said...

that is just wonderful...thanks for sharing it.

GratefulOne said...

Thank you very much for sharing this with us. It's going to stay with me for a very, very long time.