Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Confessions

My favorite President died yesterday. I loved him because he never aspired to be President of the United States. It was a strange fluke of history that landed him in that office, and I think his humility was something to indeed aspire to. And that is as close as I will ever get to spouting politics on this blog.

Last Wednesday, a week ago today, on December 20, while shoveling snow, I fell in my driveway. I fell directly on my butt (and as my former boyfriend said when I told him this "That is a small target"). Which is not good because it feels like I fell directly onto my tailbone. I have been assured by folks who HAVE broken their tailbone that mine is not broken - but it hurts like hell. Yesterday someone laughed at me when I said I was worried I broke my tailbone because it hurt when I ran 3 miles on Monday and 2 miles yesterday. And, for the record, I think it was the Pride of posting the picture of my puffed up bosom and three triathlon medals on December 14 that came before this Fall.

I am madly trying to get all my CEs (continuing education) for one of my professional credentials that is due for renewal on 12/31/06. Thank God for the electronic age - I can do all this online. It is just ungodly expensive and time consuming. I am also grateful that I have time to do it this week. But I wonder why on earth I wait until the last week to do most of it when I had two years to get it done.

Lately I feel like I just need to shut my mouth in meetings - I look at others with over 20 years of sobriety and they have their little rehearsed speeches - and never share anything about themselves. Maybe I should do that? I know it is wrong, but it would be nice to "look good" for a while. Wouldn't it be nice to just focus on YOU and what YOU should be doing - and fail to mention the log in my own eye? I won't do this, but I have just been thinking about it lately and since I am confessing...

This blog had its 15,000th visitor last night. It is someone from Chicago, and I don't know who they are or how they got here. I spend WAY too much time looking at my site meter. I think it is infinitely interesting.

I love you sober bloggers. I love you sober readers. Willa is a sober reader who has over 300 days now. I wish she would get a blog so that I could visit it! She makes my day every time she leaves a comment and lets me know how many days she has.

This is a wonderful program of hours and days. I thank God for each and every one of them, and every one of you!

"I don't think happiness or unhappiness is the point. How do we meet the problems we face? How do we best learn from them and transmit what we have learned to others, if they would receive the knowledge?" -- As Bill Sees It, p. 306

12 comments:

Shannon said...

I really appreciate how much you remind me of recovery and the responsibility we have. I am glad for you being one of the people who dont have these "rehearsed speeches"

I too am saddened about President Ford passing. I think it was a true divine thing that he was our President. Think about it, he was not elected... God has a plan... He always does

ps I have a new sitemeter and I am addicted too ahhahaha

Recovery Road London said...

Hope your a*se gets better soon! :-D

Lovely pic on boxing day, btw.

Anonymous said...

Personally, I respect people who can be brutally honest (about themselves) while sharing on a group level. It constantly gives me hope that someday, maybe I'll be there too. So, my unsolicited opinion is to keep on talkin' about your own E, S and H.

Mary Christine said...

Thank you Shannon, Kenny, and Daave.

Mary Christine said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

That talk about falling on your tailbone made my monkey weak!

I think you will continue to be yourself despite what those little thoughts are telling you.

Anonymous said...

MC, this post speaks to me. I am grateful for you and others who are able to be honest. It helps me understand how I am going to get through the next 24 hours. I only have 7 months of sobriety, and I learn so much from you and other sober bloggers. I'm so proud of your running program!

Sober @ Sundown said...

We go to meetings to share our experience, strength and hope, but many times it's only our own personal experience. I get tired of the rehearsed speeches too, but I need to focus on why I am really there, and that is to stay clean and sober.

lash505 said...

that is really sweet of you congrads on the 15,000 I know some of those are mine.

Shannon said...

hang in there with the snow coming your way! stay warm

lash505 said...

Man I am glad I haven't got there yet. Stay safe and I love those shoes..

Anonymous said...

I went back this morning to see exactly when I ruined my back, and this is the fall that did it. Almost thirteen years later, I still suffer from this fall. Darn it!
Mary Christine